Media personality Natalie Brunell launched an $800 online course titled “What to Do After Getting a Girlfriend: A Bitcoiner’s Guide” — answering, one day later and at market rate, the exact question posed by The Bugle’s anonymous newly-attached Bitcoiner. The course is the second beat of the romance arc.

The curriculum covers time management, how to prioritize Bitcoin-related activities, and how to communicate a Bitcoin obsession to a partner, with practical modules on date nights, family gatherings, and vacations “where Bitcoin may not be the top priority.” Its largest focus is teaching students to talk to women in real life rather than the way they do on Twitter. “Harassment is not a recipe for a healthy relationship,” Brunell said.

Reception was mixed. One Reddit user praised the concept but balked at the price: “$800 seems a bit steep for something that could be covered in a blog post or a few tweets.” Brunell was undeterred: “Bitcoin is more than just a hobby for many of us, it’s a way of life. And if we can help Bitcoiners build strong relationships while pursuing their dreams, then that’s a win-win situation for everyone.”

irl: Natalie Brunell is a real Bitcoin podcaster (Coin Stories) and one of the community’s most simped-over figures. The course is invented; the joke triangulates the parasocial thirst directed at female Bitcoin personalities, the reply-guy harassment problem, and the paid-course grift economy.