Sponsor
Post-Rapture Preparedness
Sponsor: Left Behind Supply Company · Type: produced-spot
Hear the ad read — from Jestermaxxing Through The 1st Turning | Bugle Weekly Episode 97
You’ve prepared for retirement, you’ve prepared for emergencies, but have you prepared for being unprepared? Because when the rapture comes and millions vanish instantly, someone still has to deal with the mess. Introducing Left Behind Supply Company, the world’s first preparedness company specifically designed for those who did not make the initial cut for Jesus’ selection process. While others are focused on salvation, we focus on logistics. Our starter kit includes pre collapsed social structure guides, eighteen months of shelf stable comfort food, neighborhood pet adoption paperwork, and a helpful handbook titled, So Everyone You Mocked Was Right. Worried about infrastructure failure? Our post ascension power pack runs entirely on batteries from abandoned electric vehicles. Concerned about sudden existential dread? Every order comes with our secular coping flash cards. And because communication networks may be overwhelmed or down, we include locally hosted chat bots that can talk to you calmly and reassure you when no one else is there. Left behind supply company. You didn’t plan for eternity, but you can still plan for Tuesday. Use promo code tribulation for 10% off your first seven years. Left Behind Supply Company. Preparing the rest of us for the rest of time.
Heard On
Ad spots (1)
Produced commercials aired on the shows — playable at the exact spot in each episode.
Jestermaxxing Through The 1st Turning | Bugle Weekly Episode 97 · 2026-02-16 · at 0:00
Advertising: Post-rapture preparedness kits for those who miss Jesus’ selection process
The world’s first preparedness company for people who don’t make the rapture’s initial cut, selling shelf-stable comfort food, secular coping flash cards, and locally hosted chatbots, with promo code TRIBULATION for 10% off your first seven years.
You’ve prepared for retirement, you’ve prepared for emergencies, but have you prepared for being unprepared? Because when the rapture comes and millions vanish instantly, someone still has to deal with the mess. Introducing Left Behind Supply Company, the world’s first preparedness company specifically designed for those who did not make the initial cut for Jesus’ selection process. While others are focused on salvation, we focus on logistics. Our starter kit includes pre collapsed social structure guides, eighteen months of shelf stable comfort food, neighborhood pet adoption paperwork, and a helpful handbook titled, So Everyone You Mocked Was Right. Worried about infrastructure failure? Our post ascension power pack runs entirely on batteries from abandoned electric vehicles. Concerned about sudden existential dread? Every order comes with our secular coping flash cards. And because communication networks may be overwhelmed or down, we include locally hosted chat bots that can talk to you calmly and reassure you when no one else is there. Left behind supply company. You didn’t plan for eternity, but you can still plan for Tuesday. Use promo code tribulation for 10% off your first seven years. Left Behind Supply Company. Preparing the rest of us for the rest of time.